The church can learn a lot from gangs. Really. Men join gangs for one reason: they want a father figure.

Many troubled men grew up without strong male role models. But these men do not turn to church because the congregations they’ve attended are predominantly female, and the spirit of the place feels so warm, nurturing and gentle. Men need a masculine path to Christ. Young men crave a wilder, more demanding faith, and don’t mind the spur of discipline when it’s administered in love.

What if our churches were structured differently? What if the basic unit of the church were not the committee, but the band of brothers? What if every congregation had men leading other men to maturity in Christ? What if these spiritual fathers were challenging young men, and sending them out on dangerous missions (as a gang leader might send out a young initiate)?

Today, a young single man 18-35 is the person least likely to show up in church. Do you think a church based on spiritual fathering might turn that around?

David Murrow
www.churchformen.com

“A study from Hartford Seminary found that the presence of involved men was statistically correlated with church growth, health, and harmony. Meanwhile, a lack of male participation is strongly associated with congregational decline.”*

A quote from David Murrow at churchformen.org :

A business guru once said, “Your system is perfectly designed to give you the results you’re getting.” Christianity’s primary delivery system, the local church, is perfectly designed to reach women and older folks. That’s why our pews are filled with them. But this church system offers little to stir the masculine heart, so men find it dull and irrelevant. The more masculine the man, the more likely he is to dislike church.

What do I mean? Men and young adults are drawn to risk, challenge and adventure. But these things are discouraged in the local church. Instead, most congregations offer a safe, nurturing community – an oasis of stability and predictability. Studies show that women and seniors gravitate toward these things. Although our official mission is one of adventure, the actual mission of most congregations is making people feel comfortable and safe – especially longtime members.

If you want to turn around congregational decline, target men. That means making church more attractive to the average male – and I don’t mean seeker sensitive. Jesus constantly threw up challenges beginning with ‘If…”, barriers and hurdles, which includes being tough on doctrine, holiness (the male kind), accountability and comradery. A challenge for us all, men and women.

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1  C. Kirk Hadaway, FACTs on Growth: A new look at the dynamics of growth and decline in American congregations based on the Faith Communities Today 2005 national survey of Congregations. Hartford Institute for Religion Research, http://hirr.hartsem.edu.

It’s time to reacquaint ourselves with Christ the man. Read your Bible. He’s there! Think of His physical power – a carpenter who worked long days with physical tools. He had “the voice and manner of a leader – the personal magnetism that begets loyalty and commands respect.” Christ plows through the gospels like a wrecking ball, smashing tables, driving people with a whip, devastating the Pharisees with a word, taming the winds with an uplifted hand, toppling a detachment of armed soldiers simply by speaking His name. He never cajoles; He commands! Christ is powerful, dangerous and unpredictable. Teachers, present Christ the man. Men will follow.

David Murrow, Why Men Hate Going to Church, p. 183